Headphone Actor
by Doctor-Strider-Time
Summary: Based off the song by Jin, sung by Vocaloid IA. Dave Strider had just one thought on his mind since he heard that broadcast on the radio, get to the hill. And he wasn't going to let any old apocalypse stop him, his shades, and his headphones from escaping certain doom. Dave's POV, AU. Before SBURB. T for possible violence and possible language.
1. Radio

Headphone Actor (HS FF) 07/03/2012

…**I'm shot for ideas okay.**

**This'll be just a fic I'll update quickly at first (since I'm loosely basing it off the song Headphone Actor sung by Vocaloid IA) and get a bit slower once I start completely going off on a tangent with it. Or, where the song leaves off.**

**I may even write fics for the rest of the songs in that series, who knows.**

**But for now, I'm just writing a total bored for ideas kind of thing.**

**It's pretty AU, set before sburb obviously. Dave is pretty much going to be the only character until I start the other songs and such. I'm pretty much going to play this by ear until I get to where the song leaves off and I can really start building the plot up.**

**Just as a note, most of this is just talk. It's probably going to end up being a two or three shot with sequels or prequels, aka the other songs in the series.**

**Maybe after I get this out of the way and a couple more I'll start cementing a plot here.**

**Who frickin' knows.**

**So yeah.**

**Disclaimer: Homestuck belongs to Andrew Hussie and the song and lyrics to Headphone Actor belong to Jin and is sung by Vocaloid IA. I am none of those people.**

* * *

It was a normal day for me, Dave Strider, as I sat in my Bro's room, playing his console. I had the radio up loud since Bro was out shopping or something. Normal as ever.

I had the radio set on some weird international station, just to listen to the irony of all the silly accents. What can I say, Bro taught me well. I had learned to seek out irony whenever possible.

Suddenly the normal program in like German or something fizzled out and on came some strange announcement. It was going in multiple languages but I could tell it was urgent by the panic in the voices streaming out of the stereo. When it finally got to English I leaned into the sound of the current president's voice.

"It has come to our attention that something very severe is occurring as I speak to you. I will put it as bluntly as possible," I could have sworn I heard his voice crack. "the world appears to be ending."

His words hit me like a ton of bricks. I even broke my ever-stoic expression as I dropped the controller. My hands were shaking so badly I was surprised they held onto the controller even that long.

I quickly shot up, forgetting the game completely and nearly tripped over stray textbooks I left out. I was supposed to be doing homework but I put it off like usual. Yet that was the least of my problems, or anyone's really. I don't think my teacher would count it late since the world was ending and all.

I scrambled over to my room and picked up my headphones, my instincts telling me it was my only hope for any serenity in any situation life would ever throw at me. My trembling fingers placed the ever-blasting headphones on my head. The obscure bands Bro had told me about soothed my pain until that too was interrupted by yet another strange message.

"You want to survive, yes?"

The voice seemed so ridiculously familiar to me, yet I couldn't place a finger on it. It reminded me almost of Bro's or maybe my own, but it was so warped and hushed I could barely tell.

I contemplated the question and in no time at all I had definitely decided on yes. I mean, what idiot wouldn't want to? I was most certainly not that idiot, so I said yes out loud. I have no idea why out loud, but I wasn't really thinking anything through at that point.

It whispered many things to me but I was too focused on the birds outside. They were forming strange patterns in the sky, completely clouding it over and blotting out the evening Texan sun. Even the faint moon was covered just as quickly. I wondered where they went, probably north or something. That's birds for you.

I finally came back to the crumbling Earth and caught the last of the headphone's words,

"If you cross that hill in 20 seconds, you'll know what I mean, for better or worse. Don't doubt, just listen close- go 20 seconds ahead."

The words perplexed me, probably since I missed the better part of the headphone's message. I just assumed it meant the old hill on the outskirts of town since that's the only hill I've ever heard of being around here. And it usually takes about 20 minutes to get there by walking. I assumed the headphones got it's units of time measurement mixed up and went with my idea.

I ran across the hall, headphones still firmly planted on my head. I skidded into Bro's room and grabbed a katana, just in case. I had no idea what could have been out there so I just took Bro's rule of thumb- never be katanaless- and and ran with it. Literally.

I did leave myself enough time to scrawl a messy note in my chicken-scratch handwriting on a piece of paper and stick it on the fridge just in case Bro comes back wondering where I had run off to. I didn't tell him exactly where I was going, he probably knew already through his Bro-Knows-All powers and if he didn't, I didn't want him coming after me looking for a strife. That would be just about the worst thing that could happen to me.

I shot out the door like a cannon and flew down the street, katana at my side, ready to strike. I didn't have much reason to be poised to attack, but again my instincts proved themselves worthy by telling me it was the thing to do.

I barely noticed on my speedy way down the street the chaos ripping at the falling constructs that was once a pretty quiet city. The truth is, it was less that I just didn't notice it and more that I just didn't want to. Under my unnervingly stoic outer shell I'm a pretty scared kid on the inside. And damn, did this whole ordeal really threaten to let him out.

Even my shades wouldn't be able to protect me from that.

I just had one thought on my mind,

Get to the hill.

* * *

**Well, that was ridiculously short by my normal standards.**

**Oh well.**

**This story is going to be short by my normal standards.**

**Sooo...thoughts?  
**

**A review would be much appreciated, you don't even have to press a button anymore. Just type a couple words and bam, you're done.**

**The nice thing about reviews are that they let me know you're still reading.**

**Me knowing you're still reading means I update.**

**You want me to update, correct?**

**So review. :3**

**-Mint**


	2. Strider's Don't Cry

HeadphoneActorChap2 07/03/2012

**Updating quickly like yeah. I found myself bored with nothing to do so I just decided to continue writing this just for the hay of it.**

**Anon reviewer: Well, I'm kind of going along with the song. I guess it was a bit out of character for Dave to act like that, but I still don't think that he'd think someone was joking. And that was pretty much the whole broadcast. They just needed to get the message out, not go on forever. But thank you for your review and your criticism! It is much appreciated!**

**Well…this chapter's probably going to be pretty quick on my standards like the last one.**

**At least it's a quick update, right?  
**

**Disclaimer: Homestuck belongs to Andrew Hussie and the song Headphone actor was written by Jin and sung by Vocaloid IA. I am none of these people.**

* * *

I slowed my pace as I noticed something strange about the skyscrapers on the horizon. The huge buildings appeared to almost be wobbling, about to collapse into rubble. I made it a point in my mind to avoid any building at all costs from that point forward.

I also had wanted to recognize the voice coming out of the headphones. It had been itching at me ever since it first came to my ears. I had finally identified it as my own after going over it over and over again in my mind until it almost hurt to think about it. Finally I placed a finger on the distinction that separated it from any other person's voice, I could hear the light Texan accent that came out when I was distressed with something. I usually tried to hide my accent as best I could, but when I get nervous -which is hardly ever I might add-, I forget to cover it over and it slips out.

"If you cross that hill, then in 20 seconds, you'll know what I mean, for better or worse. Don't doubt, just listen close - go 20 seconds ahead..." My voice repeated for the millionth time. I was really starting to tire of hearing it over and over and over again, the message had sunk in the first 413 times or so.

I zoned out the ever-whispering headphones and then started to pay a bit more attention to my surroundings. The intersection was filled to over the brim stuffed with cars trying to escape the looming apocalypse -not really the brightest idea when you think about it, nowhere to hide really- and people alike. Men, women, children, animals, I was drowning in a sea of all the like. I did all I could to weave in and out of the crowd like Bro's needle through his newest Smuppet.

People were rioting left and right, shouting incoherent things in every direction imaginable. It made it even hard to find irony in the situation, which distressed me. I had always been able to find irony in every sticky situation I got stuck to, this whole world-decimation thing just hadn't sat right with me. And when something doesn't sit with a Strider, you must be pretty damn screwed.

While dodging people in the crowd I found myself nearly trip right over a sobbing girl leaned against a store window. In a normal situation I may have contemplated using some Strider charm on the girl to attempt to cheer her up, but I was in no helping mood at that point in time. I was assuming that I'd probably have to take her with me which I really didn't want to even think of having that as a burden so I just ran on, ignoring her cries.

I passed a priest muttering on a street corner somehow not getting bowled over by the passing rioters. He was whispering something to the wavering sky as if speaking to a higher power, pleading it to stop the armageddon. I almost stopped and told him it was a bit late for that and that we're already screwed over but I kept running, staying silent.

I remembered I hadn't spoken a single word ever since I cussed out Bro's console when I lost a life.

It almost stung to think about that.

As I shooed the painful thoughts of home and Bro out of my mind I noticed a single person fighting against the stream as I was on the other side of the street. I did a double take but the second I looked back, the vaguely familiar figure had already disappeared from sight.

My own urgent voice broke me from my thoughts of the fleeting figure,

"Twelve minutes left..." It persisted. I winced, not much time left. At the pace I was going then I would never make it in time. I had to go the other way. There was no other route that could lead me to my final destination in time, otherwise the crowded sidewalk would become my final destination. I wasn't going to let that happen.

I swerved off the congested sidewalk nearly knocking over many a person and sprinted into a nearby deserted alley. I was relieved to breathe air that wasn't polluted with the stench of other people's sweat and instead thick with the reek of yesterday's hamburgers from the nearby fast food place. Not much of a change, but anything somewhat familiar comforted me.

I didn't slow my pace to a walk even though I could move freely, my tired legs continued to pump on. I felt as if nothing could stop me in one part of my mind and in the other as if I should just stop running and lay down and cry. The latter of that was never going to happen, I thought. I'm a Strider for God's sake. Strider's don't cry, even if it is the end of the world.

With that thought in mind I continued down the alley with the headphones counting down, the numbers seared into my vision.

I was going to make it and no lousy goddamn stupid apocalypse was going to stop me.

Because I am the Strider.

It's me.

* * *

**Wow, look at the plethora of bad references I stuck in there. |D**

**Anyway, this took me just a tad longer since when I was over halfway done writing this I accidentally closed the tab instead of a different one. I had to re-write all the words. All of them. ;a;**

**Wow, I really have no shame when it comes to bad references, do I?**

**Changing the subject, please review! I really love reading all of your reviews (ALL OF THEM!), even the critical ones. So yeah, review. :3**

**See you all very soon!  
**

**-Mint**


	3. Sorry

07/11/2012

**Meh, updating a bit later than I originally expected, but oh well, here I am with this story pretty much no one's reading.**

**But I don't care though, as long as a couple of people are happy with this story, I'm happy. ^^**

**So, yeah, at this point I'm probably about half-way through the song, maybe a bit more. I may just finish off the portion based on the song right here and start with weird plot shit of my own devising after this. Moohaha.**

**Well, as I said in an earlier chapter, I'm really playing this by ear.**

**So, onto the story!**

**Disclaimer (even though I don't really feel like I have to put this here anymore): Homestuck belongs to Andrew Hussie and Headphone Actor belongs to Jin and is sung by Vocaloid IA. I am none of these people/vocal synthesizers.**

* * *

Even from the twisted labyrinth that is the alleyways of Houston, Texas I could still hear the horrific chorus of shrieks from the crowded intersections I left behind. They had penetrated beyond my ears, it hurt my very being hearing such a painful and hopeless sound. I had felt my eyes tear up again but I had quickly shaken my head to the side, the single droplet cascading onto the faded pavement below. A simple noise wasn't going to break Dave Strider the tough, Texan cool kid. I was better than that.

I ran along for another ten seconds, my mind reeling about how to block the sound out. I had finally realized that there was just not ending the symphonic yet ear-burning song, humanity's final ballad. I also knew the sound would haunt me forever with it's horrific beauty, something completely unforgettable.

I swerved between trashcans, trying to copy my Bro's flash-step techniques. A couple of times I felt the surge of success but I got karma served to me as I would trip over a stray rock, sending me off balance. I would try to regain my equilibrium as swiftly as possible and run on, never stopping for anything.

At 4 minutes and 13 seconds I almost thought I heard an unfamiliar blip interrupt the rushed countdown. I shook my mind off of any suspicions I had, it's not like 413 is some important number or anything. It's pretty fucking random when you think about it.

But, of course, I had no time to think about it. I had no time for anything, anything except running and existing. But my time for the latter was ticking by quicker than my legs were pumping, doing the former.

I may have contemplated the irony of such a relationship in a non-apocalyptic situation. But, of course, as I had elaborated many times that was definitely not the case. I actually happened to be in quite the opposite. But, of course that would be pretty obvious now and would not need to be repeated.

"Run, run, there's one minute left," My voice chided, urging me on. I had wanted to shout that's exactly what I was doing dumpass, but I had no time for such tomfooleries. The headphones weren't lying, I really was down to one measly little minute.

One minute left to reminisce on my life. One minute to remember my friends, my brother, everything else I held dear. One final minute to take in all of what human society has accomplished, no matter how little it may be compared to how much could have been done if it weren't for obstacles like armageddon and such. Such a small amount of time for so much.

Yet, I only had to do the latter if I failed. Which of course, I wouldn't. Yet a tiny speck of doubt kept repeating the words to my favorite song in the back of my mind as a backup plan if I was defeated by the cruel element of Time.

It kept ticking down, almost out of spite I had thought. Of course that probably wasn't true, since elements aren't sentient beings, but I was too desperate to care. I tried my best to tune out the doomsday clock and did so successfully.

But out of nowhere my eyes registered something amazing, a miracle. The hill which I had travelled what felt like a lifetime to get to. My final destination in what I believed to be the 10k marathon for survival. It was right before me, just waiting to be crossed. The gateway from a burning hell to what could be my salvation.

My breath escaping me, I finally ran up the hill, heart skipping way too many beats for my liking. I smiled my first genuine, full-blast, teeth flashing smile since I couldn't remember when. Not caring about aloofness anymore I let out a whoop of victory, as if anyone else would care. It's the freaking apocalypse, I do what I want.

But what I saw next made me drop my katana out of sheer shock.

It was a wall, a translucent wall. I could see what almost looked to be a white room beyond the barrier but I couldn't quite make it out. I followed the wall's curved arc up to find it projected the sky down onto a city of constructs. What I saw next blew a hole right through everything I knew.

My Bro came flash-stepping up the hill, his most prized sword in one hand, half of his headphones in the other, pressing them to his right ear. He glanced at me from behind his shades but sped past and up to the wall.

"Look, I don't know what you're pulling here, but I'd advise you to elaborate. Pronto." He growled in his lowest, most dangerous voice, his mouth brought up into an angry sneer.

At first I wondered who, or what, he was talking to but I quickly realized. There was a small collection of who I guessed to be scientists in long white coats just beyond the translucent barrier.

"Magnificent..." One muttered, scrawling something onto a clipboard intently. The rest nodded and took note on their clipboards as well. Almost as if we were experiments...

Of course that just made Bro more mad, he charged up against the barrier like a bull and broke through. I was still rooted to the spot, being at a complete loss for words, thoughts and actions at the point.

Bro noticed my completely dumbstruck state and grabbed me by the shoulder. He yanked me through the barrier, pleasing the scientists. I managed to have one sarcastic thought come to mind through all the confusion, it's like some kids in a candy store. Very fat kids in a very large candy store.

From behind the barrier I watched the town as it's projection rippled like a hologram. It was actually a lot smaller from the room I was in, just about the size of Bro's recording studio back home. I didn't even consider questioning how in hell it all worked though, I truly didn't want to clog my brain with confusing shit like that.

"No longer necessary," One of the scientists said. He fished in his pocket for a second and pulled out something reminiscent of a bomb.

"Hey now look here buddy, you're not going to blow up my town and get away with it." I managed to muster the courage to utter, slowly walking up to the little pack of over-glorified nerds. But before I could get close enough to swing at one, Bro grabbed me by the back of the shirt. I whipped around in disbelief, but he just shook his head.

I could only watch helplessly as the scientist calmly tossed the bomb, as if it were as normal as brushing your teeth. I couldn't make a sound as the bomb flew through the barrier and exploded inside the holographic city, my city, completely destroying all that resided inside.

Before I could even regain any of the fallen pieces of my sanity, one of the scientists in the front of the pack spoke up.

"Experiments 416," She regarded Bro who didn't move a muscle, "And 417," She looked to me this time. I just gave her my blankest expression, eyes as wide as saucers under my shades, "Have been living in Testing Area 15 for the entirety of your lives. This has all been a test of your many traits and attributes. You have lived under a certain set of variables set by our techs to test you. Since you have proved usable, the testing field has been terminated, and you will train your abilities to their fullest in our facilities."

Her words hit me like the biggest sack of bricks to ever fall out of the sky and onto some poor dick in the impact zone for said bricks. My eyes moved from Bro, who had gone rigid, to the burnt wreckage that had been one of the biggest cities in Texas. My city. The city I grew up in. But now all of it had gone up in the smoke of defeat.

I hadn't escaped hell, I was just entering it.

From the headphones that I had forgot about, still clinging to my ears I heard the faintest word. A single word that would never mean enough to undo the horror I had been thrown into.

"Sorry..."

* * *

**Okay then. That turned out a bit Sadstuck.**

**And as you probably could tell, I was stretching out a lot of the alley scenes. I was trying to make it longer. I hadn't really expected myself to go out and write that big bit when Dave reaches the barrier.**

**And just to inform anyone who would happen to be reading this, quite a few parts of what happened in this chapter weren't actually in the original song lyrics. All the dialogue (except for Bro and Dave's) was in there and a few select words as well, but I seriously stretched out 4 stanzas on song out of like 12.**

**It's pretty much the middle of the flipping night, I have a really bad cold, and I REALLY want some sleep.**

**So yeah, please leave a review, and I'll see you in the next chapter for more weird plot shit! cx**

**~Mint**


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